SOL: Hair today, gone tomorrow.

On my way home I stopped at a pet store.  Not my usual place, but one I’d been meaning to go out of my way to visit because I knew they stocked this supposedly amazing pet-grooming tool.  As I pulled out my credit card, I thought, “It had better be amazing because for $40 I’m going to be pissed if it doesn’t make any difference!”

I have two cats.  One, Tristan, is a regular cat.  He and I live together in much the same way I’ve lived with every other cat I’ve ever had.  I comb him, I brush his fur off my black wardrobe, I throw my clothes and sheets in the laundry and they come back hair free.  Totally normal existence.

And then there’s Beau:

Before bringing this pretty boy into my home, I had no idea that life with a long-haired cat was any different from life with a regular cat.  In the four years we’ve lived together, Beau has transformed my home into a giant fur ball.  No matter what I do, I can’t keep up with his hair.  No matter how much I comb him, there’s still so much shedding.  No matter how many times I wash things, I’m still finding his long silky locks on them.  I’ve spent a fortune on tape rollers, spent hours checking my hair for his hair.  Nothing has been strong enough to beat back the wafting clouds of fur that have become standard in my rooms.

On top of the fur-cloud trauma is the fact that Beau hates to be combed.  Grooming your cat is supposed to be a nice, loving, bonding time, like a fancy kind of petting.  Tristan loves being combed.  Beau, not so much.  I have to clip his nails before I get out the comb so that my scratches won’t be so bad.  Combing is an ears-flat-back, growling-deep-in-his-throat time for Beau.  Instead of a sweet bonding moment I get the promise that he’d take my face off if I’d just let him get at me.

But then I heard about this comb.  It was supposed to be a miracle product, able to make grooming a boy like Beau not only easier but a quintillion times more effective.  I wasn’t sure I believed it, but I’d tried everything else, why not this?

Let me just say: that picture above? Taken after I combed him tonight.  Notice how not crazed and enraged he looks.  Notice how he’s sitting somewhere near me and not hiding behind the bed or in the window to escape my ministrations.  And notice this:

That hair in the front?  I separated it to show how much fur I might have gotten using the old comb in the same amount of time (we would have lasted about 15 or 20 minutes and lasting that long would have included at least one scratch and several carefully-evaded bites).  The picture barely does it justice.  I think I have enough fur to create a whole other cat … to start spinning cat-fur yarn … to stuff a pillow … to circumnavigate the globe if I lay out each strand end to end.

Just as importantly, I have not one scratch.  I could have kept combing and gotten more hair, but Beau was reaching the end of his patience, and I was starting to sneeze (yes, because on top of everything else, I’m allergic to my cats!), so it was time to stop.  Can’t wait to comb him a little more tomorrow.  My relationship with my plush boy is moving into new territory!

Check out the rest of today’s slices over at Two Writing Teachers (Stacey’s back!)


18 thoughts on “SOL: Hair today, gone tomorrow.

  1. I don’t know what amuses me more, the obviously delight you have in effectiveness of this new gizmo or that you are allaergic to your own pet. I’m happy that you’re happy, with it. Granted, you’ll understand that given my slight allergy to felines as well, if I’m a tad wary of any offers of hand-made and hand-stuffed dolls from you in the foreseeable future.


    1. I was trying not to do a product placement, Mopsy. Should I just go ahead and tell? It was (drumroll, please) the FURMINATOR. No, really, that’s what it’s called. The most ridiculous name possible. I bought, of course, the long hair, small cat version.


  2. What a beautiful cat! I love your word choice throughout the whole story, it really made the humor come through. Good luck with this new tool and taming the fur.


    1. Thanks, Elsie! And thanks for the compliment for Beau. He is really a beauty. And so is Tristan, just in a straight-haired way. It’s funny to me that they’re from the same litter and yet so different.


  3. I have been in your shoes so many times (even the allergic to your own cats part). I chuckled continuously as you described your cat in this inconvenience of brushing…the ears, deep growling, strategic bits and clawing. What a vivid picture. I have a husky and have a feeling that your miracle brush is the same one I use on my pup. May it bring you and Beau closer…without the scratching.


  4. Love the picture of Beau. You crafted your piece that created smile after smile after smile. The use of the hyphenated words really added emphasis. Sounds like an awesome device.


  5. I loved this piece! Really enjoyed it!

    I think I actually have the smaller blue version of that comb, but my kitty Hated it with that capital H. She tolerates the wire brush because she knows there’s a treat coming, but not this one. Hmmn. Maybe I need to adjust my technique or something!


    1. Oh dear, sorry your cat didn’t like it … but glad you liked the post. I’m happy to say that Beau has begun to enjoy being combed. It’s really a new world over here!


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