Hey baby, hey baby, hey!
Girls say, boys say
Hey baby, hey baby, hey
Hey baby baby
Can you make it make sense? Why would anyone think sending me a private IG message trying to hook up was a good idea, was a sensible idea, was an idea that should actually exist in any reasonable version of a universe that I inhabit?
I love that Gwen Stefani song, and those lyrics fit this dude so perfectly. Let’s factor in some additional data:
- You “met” me in a zoom meeting this morning.
- During the course of that zoom meeting, you twice mentioned your wife. TWICE.
- While I do have the most gorgeous virtual background in the history of fake rooms, there is absolutely nothing about me in that space that looks anything like flirting or an invitation of any kind.
- To open your message by saying, “I sure had to do some digging to find you online!” is super creepy. Yes, I’m sure you had to make some kind of effort to find my IG. Why would you do that?
Ugh. Needless to say, I rejected the message and creepy dude is blocked. I am most definitely too old for this nonsense.
It’s the 14th annual Slice of Life Story Challenge!
Head on over to Two Writing Teachers
and see what the rest of this year’s slicers are up to!